Skip to main content

The Breakup...

Today I decided I wanted something more, so I'm breaking up with you. 
Now, I can honestly say that I am a Ride or Die chic. I didn't realize it until now... I realized that I've rode with you thru thick & thin, to the point I was willing to die for the risk of losing you. You were my comfort when no one else was there. You were the one I ran to because your arms were always open, welcoming me. You bottled each tear that ever fell from my face, every word spoken out of disbelief or frustration. You cradled me tight... at night... on those lonely nights I climbed in your arms while you made love to me oh so sweetly. Speaking all the right words I needed to hear to rock me gently to sleep. 
Gently to sleep you rocked me. With each  gently stroke of your beautiful words, I drifted deeper to sleep until I no longer desired anything more than your sweet touch & your beautiful, soft words kissing me in all the right places... i craved your touch & your voice... All until one day i heard something that made me open my eyes & suddenly I realized I was in bed all by myself... naked & afraid... alone & bewildered... searching but I couldn't find anyone & you... where did you go? After all those intimate nights we shared... surely you out of all people should be here because i just knew you cared... where are you? I need you. I'm scared...
I hear a voice but it doesn't sound like you... actually I hear many voices. Some telling me to go back to sleep. Some telling me this is how it's supposed to be. Then another saying I desire more of you. I need you to wake up. You have to get up before it's too late... Who is this talking? To be honest, I really am tired. I'm not sure how long I've been asleep, but I'm still so tired. Maybe I should follow my first mind & lay back down. It's dark & cozy in here anyways. I don't know anything else. What's this voice I keep hearing... telling me there's more than what I can see right now... you just gotta get up. It's telling me to follow him... but follow him where? Get up & go where? It's dark & I can't see. I don't have on any clothes, I can't find my shoes & my hair is a mess & to be honest i could really use a bath. What's that smell? It stinks. 
What does he see looking at me? He's still telling me to get up & follow him. My bed feels really good right now but he sounds so sure & there seems to be an urgency in his voice... i guess i could get out for a little bit... even though I don't know where we're going. But what's crazy is the more I look at where I am the more convincing he becomes. I sense hope, light, even water... I didn't know how thirsty I was... I think I'll get up & get out of here. 
I see you now... where have you been? I was looking for you... since you were so quiet I listened to him... you don't want me to leave? I need you to let go of my hand... why do you look so desperate & so angry? We did have a good time & what a long time it was...
 I mean, I'm not sure that I want to go, but I know that I'd like to see something different, especially since it's so dark in here. Dont you smell that water? I am so thirsty... oh, you cant have any? I'm sorry... but he says he has more he desires of me... of all the time we've spent together, I don't ever remember it feeling like this... then too, until he said something I didn't know there was anything desirable about me...  I want to see what he's talking about... I gotta go & don't wait up for me.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

You Can't Stop...

Last night at WNBS I just began to write this message below. Although I know this word was for me, I wanted to share it with you also, just in case you needed to hear it also… …Somewhere you have gotten tired or have grown weary with the gift God has given you. I need you to ask God to renew your strength and to revive your spirit. The gift that lies within you is not for you, but for others. You have been trusted with this gift. You have been equipped with this gift. You hold something that someone needs. I know that you are tired. I know that you feel misused, often abused and at times unappreciated. I know that you feel that you can’t give anymore of you. I know that you feel like “God, how can I give out when I am in need”? Please know that as you give, He will give to you. As you bless His house, automatically, He will bless your house. Remember that what He has given you, He knows just how much you can bare before it runs low on fuel. It’s funny that the gifts we are bless...
2 comments
Read more

Work That Thing...

So, I'm sitting listening to a Youtube video on Confidence and the words below just came pouring out. I have a gift of Encouragement. I know this because this is the thing that I try to give others. Also, this is the thing that I desire most of others. So I go above and beyond to encourage the next person, no matter who they are. I just want them to feel better, because I know what it feels like to not feel like you have the ability live up to your potential. I want you to know that you can anything that you put your mind to do. There is nothing that can stop you from being you, not even you. The only thing that is standing in your way, is one: your view of yourself, and two: that belief of the word that has been spoken over your life. This is not a word that you might be able to hear verbally, but it may be a word that comes as a desire deep within you, that you are unable to shake. No matter, where you try to go. No matter how hard you try to kill the thought. No matter...
Post a Comment
Read more

Intervention

Intervention...   I am reminded of the movie Frankie and Alice. I said that I was going to go back and watch that movie. Because Frankie has a personality disorder. Frankie had Alice, Frankie (herself) and Genius to deal with. Frankie was trying to cope with life the best way that she knew how to do so. In her regular self, Frankie was an exotic dancer and did things that comes with that lifestyle. Alice was a person Frankie had tucked away from her past and it was almost like she didn’t exist. Alice was determined to make Frankie pay for what she had done to her at such a young age. Frankie knew the events had taken place but back in that time and even still in her present time, there were many things that were left unsaid. So Frankie accepted her reality but never let the memories go. This was a place she would visit every so often but instead of her prompting the memories the memories would be triggered by a song, vision, an event or person that closely resembled anyth...
3 comments
Read more