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Where Do I Go From Here...

Ok, so things didn't turn out how you expected, hoped, planned or wanted for them to go... The question is now, Where Do I Go From Here?

Sitting in the same place, rehearsing the same dream can be depressing. It can be daunting. I do understand though why we rehearse these thoughts over and over. It was a HIGH hope. It was so PROMISING. It's enough to make one keep revisiting it. So there we are in that SHOULDA, COULDA, WOULDA  syndrome.

There comes a point in life where we do have to access our situation and just come to a realization and know that, it just did not happen. Not even necessarily that it didn't happen for any particular reason, but that it just didn't happen, regardless of the reason why.

The thing about it though, as promising that the idea or dream we visit often was, we aren't there anymore. There are some things that we must do while in our youth, or that we must do by a certain time. Some things we just simply don't have room for anymore. Then there are some things where there is still room for but we must learn to reinvent that dream for the time we are in now.

What we must focus on, is not why it didn't happen and who's to blame, but Where am I now? What do I have left? What have I gained from my experiences? What can I do now with this? If we don't start looking at our now, we will be a few years down the road, hoping and wishing again. Then we will look up and wonder, where has the time gone. This is why we so often hear that NOW is the time... The harvest is plenty but the laborers are few. So often we are waiting on the perfect time to make something happen. The reality is, there is no perfect time. Time just happens and we must get in the flow of the Holy Spirit because it is always moving.

Like myself, so many people are unsure of what value they add., We all think there is this big, magical thing we are supposed to do. So we look at this big picture and look at where we are and tell ourselves, I can't do that. As cliché as it is, the saying still holds true; Every mile walked began with one step, then another. Sometimes starting is the hardest part, then I would think that the next is finding a rhythm and staying on course. I wonder what would happen if we started then continued to walk and actually stuck around long enough to see progress?

The question I am asking myself now is, What Do I Do Now? Where Do I Go From Here? I'm tired of talking about the same old thing. I'm tired of rehearsing the same story and sitting in the same place. What can I do now with what I have left? This is more of a question, that is directed to our Father in Heaven. This is more of a prayer...

There comes a point in time where in the midst of everything tossing and turning, moving in every which direction that we hear that voice from deep within speaking. That voice from within is calling out to me, letting me know that something has to change. There is more that's in store for you. You have to get up. You have to talk to me. You have to move some things out of the way. You have to reprioritize. You have to let go of some things. You have to seek my face. There is a way through this, but you have to talk to me in order to get out.

This is my prayer for myself and I'd like to extend a hand out to you also if you are feeling this same way...

Father, here I am, in this place again. Father I have gone out in search for things to satisfy me, to fill me and make me whole. From my greedy search, I have come up short and feel more empty than ever before. Lord, I hear you. I hear your spirit calling out to me, saying, "take up your bed and walk". I've wallowed in this place for long enough and I'm ready to move. I don't care if I don't know where I'm going, or what I am to do. All I'm saying is that I hear you and I'm listening...


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