Jessica S. Preston

Dear Secret Keeper, Thank you. Right now, I’m listening to artist Lauryn Hill album, The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill where the song Zion is playing right now… It’s so dope. I was reminded from a movie I’d watched years ago ‘Disappearing Acts’ where Zora compared herself to Lauryn Hill getting pregnant at a late age, in the height of her career, ensuring her producer she would be ok. I’ve heard this song before, but now I understand that this is her song to her unborn child. What a beautiful song it is. Listening to this song and even thinking back to a girl at camp the other night, awing over her 1 year old son is very warming to my heart... I read a post somewhere, you can tell the character of a woman by the way she treats her children; I’d dare to add, people in general. The way a woman treats her children & others are a direct reflection of how she sees herself… I remember when I found out I was pregnant with Jordan. At the young age of 16, I remember the feeling I f...

"Jess, I'm thinking about coming down tonight instead of tomorrow for the funeral. I told my mom I'd be there tomorrow..." "You can come here and stay the night. You're good." "I'm leaving now & I'll be there in a bit." "Ok, be careful." I hear a knock at the door... "Come in." "What's up??" 'How you make it here so fast?" (He mumbled something) I could tell by the look on his face, he was exhausted... I'd never seen him like this.. he's usually full of life. Still sitting on the couch, laptop open, I watched as he undressed to his basketball shorts & white tee..  he came over, without saying a word, laid his head in my lap while stretching his legs out across the length of the couch. I sat there for a minute, not knowing what to do, so with my laptop now to my side, I continued to type. Within minutes, he'd fallen asleep, breathing softly into my tummy. The mom...

You what... you want me back... man, chill. You see, I waited.. I waited for you. I waited for you to quit fucking around with the other brawds. I waited for you to get your shit together. I waited for you knowing there was no changing in your behavior in sight. I heard your words, trust me & everything will be alright.. I trusted you alright. I told myself, hold it down while you get it together. The late night calls, random text, salty slugs from your tramps... I dismissed all that, just to show you I trusted you. To show you I loved you. A down ass bitch, that's what you wanted right? I am that down ass bitch. My loyalty could never be confused... only to a nigga who only knows loyalty from fuck niggas & brawds. This loyalty I have, I was born with it. It runs deep in my  veins. I knew something wasn't right when I couldn't find my rest around you. Real always recognize real. I guess that's what I get for trying to be one you wanted me to be instead of being ...